Holding on Tight

       II've decided that i really like pink..like really really like pink..lol.  So..yesterday was an interesting day..i woke up and decided that i needed to get started on making my dream of opening a safe house for teens in New Bedford a reality. I know making this happen is going to be a lot of work, there's not a doubt in my mind about that. So i got up got dressed, prayed that God have His way in all of it and i walked my crazy self down to the Mayor's office. So if you guys know me you know that if i am determined about making something i'm not gonna walk away without making it happen. So i went down to the office of taxed properties, and i was asking about homes in the city that may be condemned or abandoned that the city might want to get rid of rather cheaply. The woman inthe office basically gave me the run around like most places like to give to young people. She gave me a phone number where i can call about the auction that will be coming up soon for these houses. I took the number this woman clearly has no idea how much i can bug people whn i am passionate about something. So before i left city hall, i decided that hey, why not stop by the mayor's office. So having no clue where it was, i asked some dude in an elevator thing and he brought me up to the mayor's office.  It was a pretty nice office, pretty fancy i must say. The receptionist looked at me like i was a little nuts, especially when i was like i need to speak to the mayor, about changing New Bedford. The mayor wasn't there, and i decided that i was not leaving until i spoke to someone, so i met with the mayor's top advisor. I think his name was bill or something.

      So here i am a 24 yr. old, with no expierence speaking to politicians, that simply has a heart for the teens and young adults in the city. So i explained my dream to this man, and i explained the need for a place, a communtiy for young adult to go to, to feel like a part of a community a place where people love them for them, a place where they can sleep at if they have no place, a place to call home. There was nothing out there to help me, nothing that was opened to the public where i could just go anytime and be welcome.  A place where these teens/young adults, can know what it's like to belong to a family, to be apart of something. God has put this on my heart since i was a child, i have always wanted to help people, it is my passion. Since i became a christian i have seen a need for love and community not only amongst those who don't know Christ but also those who do know Him as Savior. I want others to see the Lord, and to realize that they need Him, not because i tell them they need Him, but because they realize they need Him. I know alot of hurting people in New Bedford, I myself have been through alot in my life, and i kno that God works ALL things to the good of those who love HIM and are called according to His purpose. (romans 8:28) He doesn't just use some things it says ALL things, good and bad. My life is no longer my life, it is a life that belongs to Chirst. I want people to see that there is someone who loved them sooo much that HE willingly gave His life for them. God has gotten me through life, not my own strength but His. We all complain about the violence and drugs in this city, yet we do nothing about it, i think it's time we get off of our religious high horses and put our actions to the words that we speak.

      So anyway after talking to the mayor's advisor i was given other outlets to explore. aka, more politicians to speak to, to see if they think this is as good an idea s the mayor's advisor thought it was. I was given phone numbers and addresses to contact and go visit different politicians to get them to back me as well. He also recommend that i write out a prposal to present to different officials within the city of New Bedford. HE forewarned me that this was going to be a lot of work, and i looked at Him and said," my whole life has been a lot of work, nothing has ever come easy for me, i'm ready to do this, it needs to be done." He smiled, and told me that He had never heard of the idea that i had before i came along, but it truly makes a lot of sense and he  believes it would make a change in New Bedford. No kidding!  Anyways, so my goal for today is to give a couple politicianss a call, and set up an appointment to see mark montigny. My mother knew mark well, and when i met the mayor's advisor and i introduced myelf he looked at me and said..."heather Trombly..hmm..why does that name sound so familiar?" It seems people always seem to have heard of me...that could be a good thing or a bad thing. It always makes me wonder. So in all of my excursions yesterday, i learned that, connections are a good thing i guess. I could defintely use some prayer about this whole thing though i wanna make sure that it all goes according to GOD"S will not my own. Who says dreams can't come true???

I'mmmm back!!!!!

     Sorry it's been so long since i last wrote life has basically been quite busy for me. I started college, and i've been working two jobs so time is something i usually don't have. I have been growing so much in my walk with Christ within the past few years. And as i look back upon my five years of being a christian, i see how God has trnsformed my ghetto self into someone totally sold out for Jesus. It's kind of nuts to see the ways in which He has transformed me. I mean 5 years ago, i never would have pictured myself in college, or loving God as much as i do. Nor would i picture myself surrounded by such amazing people.  It truly is all a blessing from God.  Here's one of my recent poems that i wrote..feel free to let me know what you think.

                                Still Standing                                                            

                          Heather Jo Trombly 3/9/07

Here's to the people who thought i would fall apart

The ones who thought i was screwed from the start

Here I stand my head held high

With a respect for myself that i will not deny

I may not be skinny, i may be goofy and pretty loud

But if there's anything to describe how i feel it's that I'm proud

Proud of the fact that i have overcome

That i am intelligent though for years i was called dumb

My own family said i couldn't survive

But here i am still moving forward and alive.

I am not strong, It is God who has gotten me through

He never gave up on me like so many do

I'm a little rough around the edges, but i'm okay

I stand here before you smiling both inwardly and externally today.

I have faced trials day after day, year after year

But if HE is for me, then who shall i fear?

Who is bigger then God, who is stronger then HE?

Surely not my adversaries, surely not me.

I know pain, i know hurt,

I have learned not to treat people like dirt.

I'm still standing in the Lord, the storms have come and gone

I'm moving forward forgetting not my past, as i move on.

I know where i came from, i can not forget my past

But i am looking to a kingdom that will forever last.

Money, and jewels got nothing on the riches there

And that's the kingdom about which i care.

Everyday I'm pressing on, as a runner in a race wants that prize

I'm looking for Truth not the world's lies.

And that's how it will always be

Until the day i enter into eternity.

Life is good

 So thanksgiving is coming so i figured i'd write a blog about the things i am thankful for, i know it sounds corny but, it's always good to remember the things God has taught you throughout the years and to pass on the knowledge to others, whome can learn from it, and praise the Lord along with you for it. So here goes...

1. I am thankful that i serve a God that was willing to give HIS life for me to set me free from the bondage i was under. Jesus Christ my LORD and my Savior, was a willing sacrifice, He knew what He had to do and did it, because that's what it took.

2. I am thankful that there is nothing on this earth that I can or will go through alone because God promises to never leave me or forsake me.

3. I am thankful for the trials i have went through, because they have molded me and shaped me into the woman of God i am today. I saw the promises of God come to life in all i went through, i saw with my own eyes and i witnessed the love of God even at my darkest moments when not another person was there for miles, i cry broken as God taught me that all i need is HIM, and i would go through it all again if it meant growing closer to My LORD.

4. I am thankful that i had parents who were parents to me, i am thankful that i was blessed to have both of my parents, many children in this world grow up with none. I had two of them that loved me greatly in their own ways, i learned much from them about life and people, and about the grace of God.

5. I am thankful that God brought me through the pain of loosing my mother and father and that He is continuing to bring me through it each day. I will never forget them, but even more so i will never forget the lessons i have learned in loosing them. God is good even when you can't see it at the time.

6. I am thankful for the way God has provided me the strength to mourn the loss of my nephew, life is short and you never know when your time will be, i was blessed and honored to have shared the Gospel with my nephew a.j. three days before He died. I miss a.j. greatly and noone could ever take his place in my life, but i know that God works all things to the good of those who love HIM and are called according to HIS purpose.

7. I am thankful for my blood family. We all have our differences and are very much different, but i know deep down there is a love there, that cannot be torn down or broken apart, a bond that truly only come from God.

8. I am thankful for each and every one of my nieces and nephews. Nothing or noone could ever measure the amount of love i have for each and every one of them. It would take not merely a second for me to decide whether or not i would give my life for them. There is no question in that. I pray that i can be an aunt that can truly show them, that though i have made mistakes God can turn around and change even the worst of sinners. My prayer is that one day that will all come to know Jesus, as i know Him, not just as some man, but AS GOD, WHO GAVE HIS LIFE FOR US.

9. I am thankful for the amazing family in Christ that God has given me. Someone once told me that when God takes something away He will put something so much greater in it's place. Whoever that person was..they were very wise, for it has rung true in my life. Words will never be enough to say how thankful i am to God for bringin them into my life. There's a verse that says somewhere, i always remember you in my prayers thanking God for you, and that is something i do.

10. I am thankful to God for all the blessings He has bestowed upon me, from friends to family, to laughter, to pain. All of it is only from Him.

11. I am thankful for laughter.

12. I am thankful for children...not mine..since i don't have nor am i looking forward to have any..ever. But i am thankful for their love, that is genuine and real, it's not based on anything that the media teaches, but only by the love given to them. I pray that i can learn to love others as children love those whom invest their time in them. I pray that i can learn to love people for who they are and see past their sin, their shortcomings, and see them for who they are people, who yearn to be loved and hugged.

13. I am thankful for the umass christian fellowship, for the amazing friends i have there, to the lessons i learned there, to the family it was and is to me in my times of need. God truly blesses many people through that ministry.

14. I am thankful for the body of believers in this area. I am telling you, nothing is greater then expierencing God's love through people whom show up at a funreal for someone they barely knew or didn't know at all. God is amazing.

15. I am thankful for those who have hurt me, physically, mentally, sexually, or verbally. Because it was these people who i learned many things from. And it will be the pain that they caused that GOD will use for His glory. It will be this pain endured that God may one day use to help those have been hurt in similar ways, to help them.

16. I am thankful that God loves me enough to discipline me, even though it kinda sucks when it is happening.

17. I am thankful for Chrissy, Jen and Becky who are always there for me when i need them no matter what. It's amazing how God knew exactly what i needed when He brought them into my life.

18. I am thankful for lizzy my little adopted sister who is such a blessing to me. All my life i wanted a little sister and God has taught me to be careful what you pray for. I love her soo much and God teached me soo much through her on a daily basis.

19. I am thankful for the amazing church that i attend. Each person there is an irreplacable part of my life. God truly has a sense of humor, of all the churches it was the one i did not want to go to, and it has been the one that has blessed me the most. It's funny how we think we not it all and then God is like..no..this is what's best for you. I am soo glad HE has a plan greater then the plans i make for myself.

20. I am thankful for each friend, each relationship and each person God has brought into my life, because in all of them there has been a purpose intertwined with laughter tears, joy and mourning. I am thankful that i have learned many things from many people, but even more greater things about God through God and other people.

And she again awakens from her slumber

haha..i thinks that's a sweet title for a xanga entry....especially since it has been forever since i last updated this thing. Soooo...i bet your wondering where i have been...have i been staying out of mischief...and what's life been like for me the past couple of months...or maybe you just don't care...which is totally cool as well.

  For those of you who do care i shall continue on writing this update. I am actaully doing quite well these days. I am working 2 jobs, which are totally awesome and which God is teaching me great things through. I now have a boyfriend who i must say is the greatest guy i have ever met in my entire life. He's cute, sweet, funny, honorable, honest and real. He's been through many tough things throughout his life, but God has given him the strength to get through. He lives in new hampshire, and i get to see him every 2 weeks and well..tommy is just the greatest guy ever. He plays keyboard and the drums..so he loves music as much as i do..which is an awesome thing. I really like him alot...and well..he makes me smile everytime i think of him. He reminds me alot of my daddy..which is always a great thing.

I am learning about trusting and obeying God these days. I'm finding that many times i rely on myself to get things done and figure things out rather then trusting God and letting Him be in control. Most people don't think of me as someone who is vunerable or weak, because God has brought me through many things. But let me tell you i am one of the weakest and most vunerable people you could ever meet. I have this tendency to back off people once i've been hurt, because i am vunerable and have a higher chance of getting hurt again. I am one that rather avoid conflict than have to face people and let them see me weak. I guess we all are like that in one aspect or another, but well..yeah..i am a weakling..and only because i am strong in Him do i even have the guts to say that. So God has been humbling me alot as you can see. I think it's cool that God loves us enough to humble us. Sometimes trusting God is the hardest thing to do when we want to control things ourselves...but when we obey Him and His word we find that it will be easier to trust in Him. That's what i've come to realize anyway. 

Here's some questions for you to consider....

1. How good are you at trusting God with the easiest and hardest situations in your life?

2. How often do you let go of the things you feel you need to control to let God do the controlling?

3. Take a min and be truly honest with yourself and God and ask Him what He wants to teach to you today? Are you willing to let Him teach you a lesson you may not want to learn today?

  have a great day/ night...i hope these questions challenged you in some way..love ya

So it's been forever

So wow..it seems like forever since the last time updated this thing. It has been quite a while. So hmm let's see what is there to say...well i am very much on myspace 24/7 now. But in other news...my lil borther is back in jail..which really sucks for me..because well..i miss him already. I am in the process of looking for a new job..i have 2 interviews on thursday and i'm kinda nervous..but not to badly. I also am working on a resume' for the standard times...i think it would be really cool to work there..but we shall see..basically it's whatever God wants. 

  I also been praying about going to northern uganda on a missions trip of some sort. Not sure with who or any of that..but it has been really heavy on my heart. If anyone kows me i have never ever had any desire to go anywhere overseas i am more of the i'll stay here in the US in the hood where i'm comfortable type of person. The furthest i've been away from home was when i went to upstate ny, and when my nephew died while i was there i told everyone that i was never leaving home again. Yeah well...it seems that something is up and i think it's God trying to tell me to go to uganda..and well part of me wants to go, but then part of me is like that's crazy..i could never do something like that. I know my family will think i'm completely insane...even more so then they think already, and i can only imagine the things they would say to me. They already think i'm nuts, i can only imagine what they'd say if i actually did this. But then another part of me is like..those kids..they are being hurt..they need love..they really truly do. I think it would be a really cool adventure, and i'm sure that i would learn alot about myself and uganda, and that part of me is totally game for going, but it's all pretty scary to me. I'm not afraid of where i grew up, i'm not afraid of guns..i'm not afraid of being surrounded by people who have AIDS, i'm not afraid of prostituion and drugs..i've seen that all my life. But i am afraid of  loosing people here and of people's opinions of me, and all that stuff. I know some people may not be able to see me being afraid of what people think but the truth is  am very sensitive and i don't want people to think i am a loser. So yeah it's a bit of a struggle. I need to end this for now...but feel free to leave any thoughts..love ya!

heather